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Christopher Howard

[ website | E-mail me via tinyurl! ]
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Hello, old friend [09 Mar 2009|11:38am]
[ mood | pensive ]

Jesus, I haven't been on here since June, 2004.  Lot has changed in nearly five years.  In grand fashion, I think I'll start out not with an overview of the last half-decade of my life, but I'll pick up right where I left off with song lyrics.  Casual warning -- none of these are actually about me, so don't get all verklempt.

Let's start with a classic:

I don't wanna take advice from fools,
I'll just figure everything is cool
'Til I hear it from you...
-- Gin Blossoms

And now moving on to a new local band I just recently discovered, the Good Luck Joes.  Does anyone else have any CDs that they either listened to for the first time (or listened to 100 times) during a specific moment of your life, and now those songs will be forever linked to those memories?  Yeah, kinda like that.

Me and you grammatically don't work good
But its true, we bleed the same
In a queue I wait my turn to see if you and I can work it out
But in the end I'm sorry that I came
  -- "Middle of Me"

In 48 hours, for the first time I'll feel
The end of a story too good to be real
In 48 hours, my thoughts will transcend
The line between loving and losing a friend
In 48 hours, I'll finally arrive
As news of the blackout slowly subsides
The worst I remember in 17 years
I'll walk you to my car, we'll hold back the tears
You can feel it on me
You can feel it grow on
You can feel it grow on me
In 48 hours you'll be gone
And I'm standing alone where you belong
In a garden outside, you're...
<unintelligible> (audio source here - can anyone tell what he sings?)
Where the stars all come out and the moon's always full -- "48 Hours"

You had so much to give, and there was so much we needed
You can’t just fade away, ‘cause I won’t
When in the scattered wreckage, there is a silver lining
A voice inside my head says I shall overcome
-- "Much Too Young"

Far away, what was deemed to never change
Found a rift, made a void at its own pace
In a blindside ambush fight, it all fell at the hands of a mind game
And I don't mind, and I don't mind to look inside your thoughts
and I don't mind, and I don't mind, but I can't find my way in
Frozen in time, and only you and I can see the, the warning signs
Through thousands upon thousands of honest lines
Dry your eyes
Black and white's not always as simple as it seems
But I will try to make it easy on you
-- "Frozen"

And what's happening to us?
And in the time it takes to make my reasons clear
You've gone off all because the end is near
So keep your bottled waters in a bag
And hold on tight 'cause here it comes at last
When the sun explodes it's gonna be a big disaster
When the sun explodes it's gonna mark the end of time
When the sun explodes you'll live exactly ever after
When the sun explodes you're gonna wish your hand was still in mine
-- "The Sun Explodes"

I fell to pieces every time I heard you say that you don't need me anymore
And I don't wanna be a burden
And I don't wanna drag you down
And you can find another lover
But you know no matter what I'll always be around
-- "Always Be Around"

2 comments|post comment

We used to be so happy, once upon a time... [02 Jun 2004|08:00pm]
Random song quotes:

"She had me feelin like she's ready to blow..." - Usher
"No matter how hard I try, I always make you cry..." - Brooks & Dunn
"Last thing I wanna do is make you sad..." - Clay Walker
"Why do you see right through me?" - Kasey Chambers
"Don't know much about fate, it always seemed to me...I just sit here, waitin' on my destiny..." - Todd Thibaud
"It's all about this beautiful girl...and I can't wait..." - Domestic Problems
9 comments|post comment

The highway's jammed with broken heroes on a last chance power drive... [26 May 2004|12:09am]
[ mood | shocked ]

But it's not so bad
You're only the best I ever had
You don't want me back
You're just the best I ever had...
- Vertical Horizon

New userpic -
TV QotD: "How could you fucking do this to us?? I fucking loved you..." - Christopher Moltisanti, The Sopranos, Long Term Parking (One of the best episodes of the series...I'm still reeling after two days...)

Song QotD: "You're just following the rules..." - Fleetwood Mac, "Landslide"
Song QotD #2: "You love me but you don't know who I am..." - 3 Doors Down, "Let Me Go"

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You have the most beautiful face... [22 May 2004|09:11am]
[ mood | awake ]

Thieved from warlordkittens:

If there is one person you can't stop thinking about, post this same exact sentence in your journal.

New userpic -

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I wuz b0red. [20 May 2004|11:43pm]
[ mood | tired ]

Love this song...from the new Six Feet Under season 4 promos on HBO...

Nina Simone
"Feeling Good"

Birds flying high you know how I feel
Sun in the sky you know how I feel
Breeze driftin' on by you know how I feel

It's a new dawn
It's a new day
It's a new life for me...

     It's a new dawn
     It's a new day
     It's a new life for me
     And I'm feeling good

Fish in the sea you know how I feel
River running free you know how I feel
Blossom on the tree you know how I feel

     (repeat chorus)

Dragonfly out in the sun you know what I mean, don't you know
Butterflies all havin' fun you know what I mean
Sleep in peace when day is done
That's what I mean

And this old world is a new world
And a bold world for me

Stars when you shine you know how I feel
Scent of the pine you know how I feel
Oh freedom is mine
And I know how I feel

     (repeat chorus)

And I'm feelin' goooooooooooooooood....

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This guilt has got the best of me... [17 May 2004|01:39pm]
[ mood | lonely ]

Going to see 3 Doors Down (for free! :) Wednesday...moving home in 18 days, 23 hours, 52 minutes, and 27 seconds...major packing/cleaning this coming weekend...looks like my apt will be rented at the end of June, so I'm off the hook for July rent (woot-haw!)...

3 Doors Down
"Life of My Own (live w/extended intro)"

Blame me, break me, hate me
Try your best to make me
Lose my way
And go crazy all alone
Somewhere deep inside me
I try hard to find me
And then someday
I'll have a life of my own

You're so scared I'll find my way
And won't come home

Living risky, never scared
Wander closer to the edge
Nothing valued think no fear
Always wondering why you're here
All your purposes are gone
Nothing's right and nothing's wrong
Nothing ventured, nothing gained
Feel no sorrow, feel no pain

     Kiss me while I'm still alive
     Kill me while I kiss the sky
     Let me die on my own terms
     Let me live and let me learn
     Now I'll follow my own way
     And I'll live on to another damn day
     Freedom carries sacrifice
     Remember when this was my life

Looking forward, not behind
Everybody's got to cross that line
Free me now to give me a place
Keep me caged and free the beast
Falling faster, time goes by
Fear is not seen through these eyes
What there was will never be
Now I'm blind and cannot see

(repeat chorus 2x)

Revisiting old LJ entries...5/18/2002

According to the "Which
Something Corporate Song Are You?
" Test...

what a nice song. a little sad, yes, but a nice song.

Take the test, by Emily.

Song QotD: "They'll never hurt you like I do..." - Something Corporate, "Konstantine"
Song QotD #2: "I'll never stray again." - Evanescence, "October"
4 comments|post comment

I had to leave home in order to know I love it. [14 May 2004|09:24am]
[ mood | nostalgic ]

I love this column.


College Times
Real Boobs

by Caroline Bodkin
April 21, 2004

On day two of this year's Easter visit home, as I was giving my boyfriend a driving tour of my hometown, pointing out the pretty, clean homes, the beautiful mountains, my grand old high school, making note of how the downtown's becoming more interesting, I began to hear the swelling pride and joy in my voice.

He heard it too, and asked me, "Do you want to move back here?"
Read more . . .Collapse )
I had to leave home in order to know I love it. It's where I'm from. It's a part of me even still, maybe even more than ever.

But until I make it back (and maybe I never will) I hold onto it.

Home is settled, but home settles inside.

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A Proportional Response [10 May 2004|06:35pm]
[ mood | blah ]

Without looking it up, what is the opposite of "proportionate?"

a) inproportionate
b) disproportionate
c) improportionate
d) unproportionate

Yeah, I just wasted about five minutes trying to figure that out, plus another two making it into an LJ post.

Back to work...*typetypetypetypetypetypetypetypetypetype*

Song QotD: "I don't understand what you want from me." - Hoobastank, "Out of Control"

Song QotD #2: "I was wonderin', could I just be you tonight?" - Matchbox 20, "Could I Be You"

Song QotD #3: "Funny how my favorite shirt smells more like you than me." - Norah Jones, "In the Morning"

BARTLET: "Then I ask again, what is the virtue of a proportional response?"
FITZWALLACE: "It isn't virtuous Mr. President, it's all there is sir."
BARTLET: "It is not all there is."

- The West Wing, Ep. #1.03, "A Proportional Responce"

CASEY: "I know the vast majority of people consider Jerry Falwell a spiritual pillar of great and gentle wisdom. I know that most people consider him a scholarly and tolerant man who would never judge others harshly because they were different. I know that most people consider his leadership to be a gentle, soothing beacon in a time of great social chaos. His guidance, for instance, on the great purple Teletubby matter was fraught with the kind of theological sophistication that only Jerry Falwell and a cafeteria full of sixth-graders could devise. I know, I'm going way out on a limb, but I think Jerry Falwell's a fat-ass."

- Sports Night, Ep. #1.21, "Ten Wickets"

7 comments|post comment

Life is but a dream... [09 May 2004|12:38am]
[ mood | verklempt ]

Cool...I got to take a telephone political poll. Looks like I'm a Bush-hating, pro-life, pro-taxes, gay-rights, young male Democrat. The way the questions were worded, it sounded like a right-wing polling organization (Election Research), so I tried my best to fuck with their poll. ;c)

P.S. Looks like I was right. See all the pro-Republican articles at:

I've got to take the chance or let it pass by,
If I expect to get on with my life...
- Travis Tritt, "Anymore"

Current playlist (yea, yea, yea, I'll do that Guess-the-Lyric game next time):

Oh, the Memories

01 Indochine - Punker
02 Bowling For Soup - Dance With You
03 Rascal Flatts - While You Loved Me
04 Coldplay - Beautiful World
05 SMILE.dk - Dancing All Alone (DDR)
06 Terri Clark - I Just Wanna Be Mad
07 Air w/Beth Hirsch - All I Need
08 Robbie Williams - Jesus in a Camper Van
09 Shannon Lawson - Goodbye on a Bad Day
10 Carole King - Where You Lead (Gilmore Girls Theme)
11 Sydney Forest - Kiki's Delivery Service - I'm Gonna Fly
12 Doug Stone - Too Busy Being in Love
13 Savage Garden - Two Beds and a Coffee Machine
14 Our Lady Peace - Somewhere Out There
15 Joe Nichols - Brokenheartsville
16 Gabrielle - Out of Reach
17 Manu Chao - Bongo Bong
18 Colin Raye - Somebody Else's Moon
19 Lene Marlin - Unforgivable Sinner
20 Sarina Paris - Just About Enough
21 Clay Walker - If You Ever Feel Like Loving Me Again
22 Tatu - I'm Not Your First
23 DDR - Dub I Dub
24 Jimmy Wayne - Stay Gone
25 Aneiki - Pleased to Meet You
26 Shooter - Life's a Bitch
27 Sensefield - Save Yourself
28 Johnny Cash - Hurt
29 Madonna - Nothing Fails
30 ATC - My Heart Beats Like a Drum
31 Brooks and Dunn - The Long Goodbye
32 Vision Of Escaflowne - Shadow Of Doubt
33 Happy Hardcore - Who The Fuck Is Alice?
34 Jamie O'Neal - There Is No Arizona
35 Balligomingo - Falling
36 Sugarcult - Pretty Girl
37 The Coors - Rebel Heart
38 John Mayer & Brad Paisley - Why, Georgia?
39 Keith Urban - You'll Think of Me

Famous Guy QotD:"It's kind of fun to do the impossible." - Walt Disney

Song QotD: "If you don't expect too much from me, you might not be let down." - Gin Blossoms, "Hey Jealousy"

TV QotD: "Your job is to pay the bills and do what these ladies [your wife and daughter] tell you to do." - POTUS, TWW

1 comment|post comment

I'm not slacking... [08 May 2004|01:27pm]
[ mood | blah ]

...just taking a break, really. ;c)

Well, I went 2-for-4 last round, nailing both eastern conference series to within one game, but blowing both western matchups...hey, at least I got the number of games right, if not the teams (Tampa and Philly are tied 1-1 in Game 1 as I write this, so there's no cheating).

Song QotD: "This city's made us crazy and we must get out." - Maroon 5

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Would you not like to be...okay, okay, okay... [04 May 2004|08:29pm]
[ mood | contemplative ]

Goodbye post #2:

Just got back from my last ever class session at ASU. I still have to papers to fini--err, do, but I have no more classes to attend here. Ever. Kind of an odd feeling. I'd compare it to how I felt two years ago when I attended (what I thought would be) my last ever class at CMU...but honestly, I can't remember how that felt. I don't know if it's because it was two years ago, or because I was excited to be leaving that place, or if it was because I was--as I am now--in a major transition phase in my life.

Well, goodbye ASU classrooms. I'll still be working on campus for the next four-plus weeks, so I'll save that goodbye for another time, but here's a toast to three semesters of Hebrew (in hindsight, I wish I would have done four), four math classes (that I didn't pass), a handful of religion classes (taken in the business, engineering, and math buildings), a country music class (which will remain my favorite from my two years here), two-and-a-half physics classes (definitely not for me), Astrophysics 321 (over my head math-wise, but a fascinating subject nonetheless), two computer classes (that better damn well transfer back to CMU as CPS 280 or higher), and a Jewish Studies certificate, the only piece of paper I'll bring back from ASU...other than the $12,000 student loan bill.

If you need to leave the world you live in
Lay your head down and stay awhile
Though you may not remember dreaming
Something waits for you to breathe again...
- Evanescence, "Imaginary"

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I love soundtracks... [04 May 2004|12:16am]
[ mood | lonely ]

Seether with Amy Lee

I wanted you to know
I love the way you laugh
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain away
I keep your photograph
And I know it serves me well
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

Because I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away

You've gone away
You don't feel me here anymore

{Amy Lee}
The worst is over now
And we can breathe again
I wanna hold you high and steal my pain away
There's so much left to learn
And no one left to fight
I wanna hold you high and steal your pain

Cause I'm broken when I'm open
And I don't feel like I am strong enough
Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away

(guitar break)

Cause I'm broken when I'm open
And I don't feel like I am strong enough
Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone away

Cause I'm broken when I'm lonesome
And I don't feel right when you're gone

You're gone away
You don't feel me here anymore...

5 comments|post comment

When you cried, I'd wipe away all of your tears... [03 May 2004|09:56pm]
[ mood | nostalgic ]

Worked my last ever shift for ASU Intramurals today...guess it kinda symbolizes my life here; I started working there less than a month after I moved to AZ. Been an interesting couple years, that's for sure. I now have a date; on June 5th, I'll be leaving this all behind...

P.S. I guess I'm rooting for Tampa Bay now. Go Lukowich! I want my doggie's name on the Stanley Cup!

I found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
And the reason is you...
- Hoobastank, "The Reason"

We had joy we had fun
We had seasons in the sun
But the hills that we climbed
Were just seasons out of time...
- Westlife, "Seasons in the Sun"

Today's the Macy's Day Parade
The night of the living dead is on its way
With a credit report for duty call
It's a lifetime guarantee
Stuffed in a coffin 10 percent more free
Red light special at the mausoleum...
- Green Day, "Macy's Day Parade"

Song QotD: "I might like you better if we slept together." - Queens of the Stone Age, "Never Say Never" (yaaaay for 80's covers!)

6 comments|post comment

I can't live this life...without you by my side...I need you to survive... [02 May 2004|12:11am]
[ mood | tired ]

"Forgive Me"

Can you forgive me again?
I don't know what I said
But I didn't mean to hurt you

I heard the words come out
I felt like I would die
It hurt so much to hurt you

Then you look at me
You're not shouting anymore
You're silently broken

I'd give anything now
to hear those words from you

Each time I say something I regret I cry, "I don't want to lose you"
But somehow I know that you will never leave me, yeah

'Cause you were made for me
Somehow I'll make you see
How happy you make me

I can't live this life
Without you by my side
I need you to survive

So stay with me
You look in my eyes and I'm screaming inside that I'm sorry

And you forgive me again
You're my one true friend
And I never meant to hurt you...

2 comments|post comment

Meme stolen from everyone [28 Apr 2004|11:30pm]
[ mood | blah ]

Go into your LJ’s archives.
Find your 23rd post (or closest to).
Find the fifth sentence (or closest to).
Post the text of the sentence in your lj along with these instructions.

[I] bought some dry erase markers at Target. - 2/16/02...dude I didn't know I knew Devlyn way back then. :c)

Bible QotD: "I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate, I do." - Romans 7:15, NIV

Revisiting old LJ entries...


. . . I hate Michigan.

It seems an age since I've seen you
Countdown as the weeks trickle into days
I hope that time hasn't changed you
All I really want is for you to stay
- Powderfinger, "My Happiness"

Word of the Day: Metathesiophobia - Fear of changes (3/26/02)

Foreshadowing LJ Entry of the Day: 4/5/02

Subj: A country song for every occasion. :-(

Wow. I haven't written on here in a while. Y'know, it's funny how life comes full circle...I guess everything happens for a reason. People change, the second hand advances, and life goes on. Starting over is going to be very exciting, but I know for a fact I'll have regrets. But like other people, I'm sure I'll get a second chance somewhere down the road. To quote Sports Night:

Casey: It's a vicious circle.
Dan: It is.
Casey: It's a never-ending circle.
Dan: It just keeps going round and round.
Casey: It never ends.
Dan: That's what makes it vicious.
Casey: And a circle.


Cyndi Thomson
What I Really Meant To Say

Lyrics . . .Collapse )

"Bound to Make You Smile" LJ Entry - 4/28/02:

Subj: Don't drink and drive or Mike will kick your butt

Good stuff. :)

"Got a good ol' friend here with me tonight, so I guess I'm doin' alright" - JoDee Messina

That was fun. I created a new Domestic Problems fan, watched Forrest Gump, got some souvenirs, saw an old friend, and heard three words I hadn't heard out loud in a long time.

"So here we are, tonight, you and me together..." - Dave Matthews

Philisophical LJ Entry: 5/16/02

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Ugg. Hate doing papers at the last minute.... [27 Apr 2004|03:34pm]
[ mood | amused ]

...but it's quotes like these that cause me to laugh at the antifeminist backlash of the 1980's. From a book written supposed New Right antifeminist:

Book QotD: - "Modern research has made it abundantly clear that all married women are capable of orgasmic ecstasy. No Christian woman should settle for less." - Beverly LaHaye, The Act of Marriage: The Beauty of Sexual Love

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Ready for round two... [22 Apr 2004|04:25pm]
[ mood | excited ]

I went five-for-eight in my first round picks, nailing San Jose and Calgary, while guess--err, predicting the correct result within one game for Detroit, Toronto, and Tampa Bay. Meanwhile, Boston blew a 3-1 lead, New Jersey couldn't get it up against Philly, and my Stars played like absolute shit.

With about five minutes until the first puck drops in the second round of the NHL Stanley Cup playoffs, here are my conference semifinal picks.

Metaphorically speaking, Curtis Joseph might be a better fit as a member of the Coyotes right now, as he's certainly a Phoenix which has risen from the ashes. This is his first serious chance at the #1 job in Detroit in nearly a full calendar year, and I have a feeling he's going to run with it. Calgary will battle, but Iginla and Kiprusoff alone won't be able to win them any more than two games. (Former Stars --> Derian Hatcher & Brett Hull)

Colorado and San Jose are probably the two most rested teams in the league right now. The Avalance barely broke a sweat while eliminating my Stars, while the Sharks managed to send the Blues packing just as quickly. This series will be a dogfight from the very beginning, but like Detroit, the Avs will just have too many marquee players for the Sharks to deal with. Teemu Selanne will finally make his presence known, especially if his friend Paul Kariya comes back from his ankle injury when the series returns to Denver for Games 3 & 4. (Former Star --> Mike Keane)

Home ice and rest will be the difference maker in what's sure to be a tooth-and-nail series between Philadelphia and Toronto. The Leafs wrapped up an emotional seven game series with Ottawa just two days ago, while the Flyers paid the hated Devils' greens fees last Saturday. Leafs' captain Mats Sundin will certainly come back and play hurt, helping the Buds to force a seventh game, but fatigue will keep Toronto from moving on. (Former Star --> Coach Ken Hitchcock)

Montreal came back from the dead to beat Original Six rival Boston, but make no mistake, they are not this year's Minnesota Wild. Jose Theodore is good, but a tad bit inconsistent, something definitely inadvisable when speedster Martin St. Louis is on the ice. Nikolai Khabibulin, on the other hand, lived up to his "Bulin Wall" moniker last series, allowing only five Islanders goals in 5+ games. The Lightning will have no trouble dispatching the Canadiens, making the NHL Final Four a Star-Spangled party. (Former Star --> Brad Lukowich)

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So fall asleep tonight, 'cause that brings me closer to you..... [22 Apr 2004|12:34pm]
[ mood | lonely ]

Matchbook Romance

What would you say if I asked you not to go?
To forget everyone, forget everything, and start over with me
Would you take my hand and never let me go?
Promise me youll never let me go

And now the stars aren't out tonight
But neither are we to look up at them
Why does hello feel like goodbye?
These memories can't replace
These wishes I wished, these dreams I chased
Take this broken heart and make it right

I feel like I lost everything when you're gone
Left remembering what it's like, to have you here with me
I thought you should know,you're not making this easy

I never thought I'd be the one to say
Please don't, please don't leave me

I feel like I lost everything when you're gone
Left remembering what it's like, to have you here with me
I thought you should know, you're not making this easy
You're not making this easy

Take my hand and never let me go
Take my hand and never let me go
Promise me
You'll never let go, never let go
You'll never let go, never let go
Make this last forever

I feel like I lost everything when you're gone
Left remembering what it's like, to have you here with me
I thought you should know, you're not making this easy
You're not making this easy, you're not making this easy
You're not making this easy, you're not making this easy

So fall asleep tonight, 'cause that brings me closer to you.....

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I did not recognize the fire burning in her eyes... [21 Apr 2004|09:41pm]
[ mood | quixotic ]

Stolen from deathbytamarind...members of the Bush administration in candid discussion about their penis sizes....

Movie QotD: "We got nurses who work in hospitals they can't even afford to get sick in!" - Chris Rock, Head of State

Random QotD: "If you have regrets in life, you're just gonna sit and just dwell over it...it's not healthy...you just gotta take it like it is..." - Anonymous

Song QotD: "This love has taken its toll on me...she said goodbye too many times before...her heart is breakin' in front of me...and I have no choice, 'cuz I won't say goodbye anymore..." - Maroon 5

3 comments|post comment

Not even gonna bother. [17 Apr 2004|05:56pm]
[ mood | disappointed ]

They didn't even play well enough in this series for me to be pissed off that they lost. No passion, no offensive spark, no stolen games...one of the best goaltenders in the league turned into a sieve for the second straight year...see userpic:

"This is difficult to swallow right now,'' Turco said. "You want to make a difference and I did in the series. It just wasn't a positive effect.'' At least he accepts the responsibility. Nothing wrong with being humbled. It's only a wasted experience if you don't learn from it.

Nothing else to say. Go Wings.

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